Remembering Catherine...

I  was reminded today of my late mother in law, Catherine.  I had read a blog entry earlier where the poster had received a very special gift from her MIL.  This lovely lady had given thrift store tea cups filled with potting soil and wheat grass as party favors at a recent get together that the daughter in law had attended.  She was very pleased with the thoughtfulness of the gift and was charmed by the exquisite china cup and saucer she received.  She wistfully told her MIL that she really wanted a nice china set, one that she could use for special occasions and for family gatherings. For whatever reason, she and her husband had not registered for traditional china when they became engaged to be married.  On the poster's birthday, she was excited to have received a set of china from her husband's lovely mom.  This was a special set of china however...there was one place setting each of many different china patterns.  The MIL had scoured thrift shops all over town to find 8 complete place settings.  Each place setting was unique, and there were none alike.  The perfect shabby chic china, a proverbial Martha Stewart bonanza of mismatched china.  The blogger was thrilled and so very touched that this wonderful lady had gone to such trouble to create such a one of a kind gift. 

So why would this little story prompt me to write?  Because I wistfully remembered my mother in law Catherine while reading.  She has been gone for many years now, a blessing really after having been ravaged by the terrible thief of the elderly, Alzheimer's.  Catherine and I spared for more than 20 years over trivial things it seems now.  She was a very strong and a bit opinionated woman, used to getting her way.  In many ways we were very similar.  We had our likes and dislikes, our wants and our need to provide the very best for our family, whether it be dinner, home baked cookies, holiday traditions or housekeeping.  I miss her.  In her last months, she wanted me to be with her, me the daughter in law she had been most vexed by.  In her mind, I think she liked that I stood up to her, like she did to her mother in law.  Whatever memories she had of our "engagements" over the years, it was me she talked to, told her stories to over and over, and to me she voiced her fears.  I think I helped her, just by engaging her and being there to listen, to offer my thoughts and to reassure her that she had done a wonderful job, she had lived a good life, she was a good person, and most importantly, she was loved. At Christmas time, I run my hands over the beautiful embroidered tablecloth she spent hours working on, a special gift she made for me.  I display her Christmas favorites as they have become my favorite decorations too.  I wear the huge and heavy Christmas tree pin because she loved it so much when her young son who was later to become my husband gave it to her after picking it out himself at the five and dime one Christmas long ago.  I page through the picture albums she so carefully kept for over 50 years, gazing on long dead but familiar faces from the past, and I think of her.  I cherish my memories, and shall always think of her with love, for above all, she loved us all.